Out of my comfort zone – freaking out

Sing with me: “far, far awaaaay”. Lanugage under the cut. Don’t read if you’re easily offended.F*cking far away, far out of my comfort zone.

Wow, I am way out of my comfort zone. This is outright scary. Why the hell did I decide to do this? Can I possibly do this? I am not smart enough to do this! There is no way in hell I am going to do this! I am an imposter trying to look smart who hasn’t been found out yet. They will throw me out and burn my desk after when they find out how dumb I really am.

Please excuse my language. It has been a long day. Also I’ve had a beer.

For the first time today I have visited my new workplace. It’s huge, impressive and all the people who are working in my department look like models out of a catalogue. No joking. I don’t know why, they just do. And their language abilities are surreal. They speak way better than I do and I feel like a duck that’s been thrown into a pond of swans. If you have ever had a chance to watch a duck in a pond together with swans, I can assure you, it’s not great for the duck. When I was in GB, I once watched them. Swans might look all smooth and white and pretty, like bird-models, but when they see a duck, they attack and rip out the duck’s feathers and don’t let it have any of the bread that the people are throwing into the pond, because swans are so much better than ducks!

After talking to my best friend in the world, though I feel much much better.And I think I even have a battle plan.

I thinkĀ  what I have to do now is get some swan feathers, stick ’em to my head and pretend to be a swan until my job is finished. Also I should learn how to swim and eat and sleep and talk like a swan so that I can be more like them and maybe even come close to becoming a one. Give me the white paint baby, cause mamma’s going to be a swan!

*sigh* If it was just this easy.

Out of my comfort zone – freaking out

2 thoughts on “Out of my comfort zone – freaking out

  1. Nancy L says:

    This was pretty funny. Every new job is overwhelming. Yours is just doubly so because of the language. But think how much you will learn! A month from now, six months from now, this first day will look totally different in hindsight.

    1. Fortunately I was able to pull the disguise-as-a-swan-thing off on the first two weeks, but a new intern, who looks even more like a model (why the hell do they only hire those totally great looking people and why the hell did they hire me???) just got hired, so I am pretty intimidated… All the girls have such long shiny hair and are slim and look cool and professional and all the guys are either tall and handsome or short and cute.
      I need to loose some weight! Like 20 kilos right now!

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